Life is a journey… | the ramblings and writings of a guy who prefers to write on paper, but can't live without the internet…

What is in a name…

I decided in January of 2009 that my muse needed his own blog, and consequently a name.  I’ve had a fondness for the symbology of the phoenix for a very long time, and liked the idea of mixing in that concept with my muse.  The muse was rising from within and being reborn, as I was rising from the ashes of my past.  That only got me so far, while Phoenix is just fine as a name it didn’t quite explain it all, wasn’t quite deep enough, didn’t exactly resonate with the duality of self and muse.

This set off a few weeks of searching and investigating.  I wanted to see what things made sense for me and the path from who I was to who I am becoming.  I embarked on this search from some simple start words, following strings of synonyms and antonyms across dictionaries, wikipedia, google, and various writers websites.  As I got closer and closer I realized that the word phoenix was more an attribute, an adjective.  And so, as in ancient times, it became the last name.

Then one day I came across the idea of the tragic hero.  Tragic heroes bring about their downfall because of their own decisions and the path they choose to follow. They are poor decisions which lead to their undoing due to the characters “tragic” flaw, which is historically hubris. The character realizes that they brought about their own undoing, and usually learn something from their mistake.  Even considering that some of the concepts of a tragic hero applied to my life this idea still didn’t quite fit.  Though the concept of my main flaw being hubris did characterize me quite well many years ago, I was still ignorant at the time of the poor choices I was making.  I didn’t have that self realization until much much later.

As I chewed on those thoughts, I happened upon a link referencing Lord Byron.  From there I encountered the Byronic hero.  Characterized as idealized but flawed, a Byronic hero is someone who has a sense of arrogance, is of high intelligence and perception, comes from a troubled past, is very self-critical and introspective, struggles with integrity, has bi-polar tendencies, has a distaste of social institutions specifically social classes, is sometimes considered an outcast, has self-destructive tendencies but in the end has a good heart.  There are few times in life where you find a description that is all but a spot on match, and this was one of them.  I read through information about the idea of a Byronic hero and knew immediately that this concept was a perfect descriptor.

Thus was born my muse, the Byronic Phoenix.  Flawed, broken, arrogant, struggling, set apart, and in spite of all of those things managing to rise from the ashes.

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